Top 10 Most Annoying Facebook-ers

This is a comprehensive list of the most annoying Facebook users and their outrageously obnoxious behaviors. If you are a habitual violator of any of the following, stop immediately or risk being reported to the Facebook police.

10.) People who partake in the interactive/activity statuses. For example:
"Like my status and I'll rate how good you look on a scale of 1-10"
Really?

9.) People who post endless pictures of themselves playing tonsil-hockey with their boo. That's gross. I'm not jealous or happy for you; I'm simply disgusted.

8.) People who use their statuses to shout out to other people. For example:
Jane Doe loves her gurls, Mary Smith and Anne Johnson!
Jane Doe loves her boyfriend John Adams so much!
If you really want them to know this, text them or call them. Do not write it on their wall because it will then just blow up my News Feed.

7.) People who are mad at the world and everyone in it and use their statuses to let this be known. For example:
John Man, f*ck all this. I give up! I'm better than this bullsh*t.
Please stop being vulgar, and STOP WHINING.

6.) People who use their statuses to reveal only trivial nonsense. For example:
Jane is in class.
Bob is asleep.
Jim is in the car.
Thank you for informing me. I don't know how my life would have gone on without that little gem.

5.) People whose wall-to-wall's resemble/substitute texting. For example:
Jane -> John: Baby, I love you so much. I'm so glad we got to hang out last night. Thank you for being the most amazing boyfriend ever! I LOVE YOU.
John -> Jane: Baby, I love you more. I'm so lucky to have you in my life. You complete me.
This is also disgusting and obnoxious. I would almost rather see pictures of you kissing.

4.) Those people who "like" everything. (And the people who create these ridiculous pages for others to like.) Here are some real examples:
Mike likes: that protective feeling over a friend you adore :)
You probably won't remember half of the things I never forget (Pleast stop being a Drama Queen)
Long, soft, slow, breath-taking kisses
Not having STD's (You're human. Of course, you like not having STD's. Stop being pointless.)

I have a friend who has literally "liked" 1062 pages. This is strange.

3.) People who take pictures of themselves in front of a mirror. You look pathetic.

2.) Boys who take pictures of themselves in the mirror without wearing a shirt. Thank you for letting me know that you are a douche-bag without me actually having to speak to you.

1.) People who use their statuses as diaries/journals. For example:
Susan is really upset and stressed because she has nothing to wear and her mother won't stop nagging her and she has so much homework and she is so tired.

Number 1.) That's a run-on sentence.
Number 2.) Stop whining. You sound pathetic.